MOORESVILLE — On Dec. 4, St. Therese Parish hosted one of its largest annual events, Advent by Candlelight, with 204 women gathering to renew their faith and rediscover themselves.
“We are trying to get everyone in the mindset of why Advent exists, taking a pause and preparing for Jesus’ birth instead of just the hustle and bustle of Christmas,” said event organizer Sara Plouffe.
Hosted by Walking with Purpose, a women’s Bible study group, the event is in its sixth year.
Each of the 26 tables had a host who invited friends and decided on decorations and food weeks in advance.
As parishioner Monica Dougherty explained, “Hosting a table is my favorite way to start the holiday season. We take a moment off from the craziest time of the year to step back and remember that Advent is a time of preparation to welcome the light of Jesus in our hearts. Cherishing time with close friends makes it even more special.”
That evening, the hosts decked the parish hall – with Christmas tree tablecloths, candles, glittery plates, plastic wine glasses, and touches such as presents and cards – as people were in the church for confession.
Many expressed the reasons they keep coming back year after year: the camaraderie and the speakers.
This year’s keynote speaker, author and podcaster Mallory Smyth, brought some cold weather and advice from Denver.
A mother of five, she knows what it is like to try to be Superwoman during the Christmas season and admits it can feel draining.
“As Catholic women, are we wearing purple or red and green?” asked Smyth, who was wearing sequined purple lace, the liturgical color of the season and the correct answer to her question.
“Secular Christmas and Advent offer two completely different messages,” Smyth said, “and whichever one we choose to believe is the way we are going to enter into both seasons.”
The secular season promises family togetherness, carols around the Christmas tree and the nostalgia of childhood past, all while emptying wallets and inflating false hopes, she said.
She said the world falsely promises that “if you just buy more stuff, if you strive a little more, if you believe enough, and if you just do enough stuff, you can finally be perfect and have this life you always wanted, and you will feel worthy.”
So each holiday season, women run off to find that perfect tree, bake countless cookies, wrap over-budget presents and find new ways to be creative with the Elf on the Shelf – but to what end?
“The promises of the culture are just not true,” Smyth said. “There is not a month in the year that is going to make your life perfect. There is no amount of work that is going to make you the ultimate magic maker. Perfection is not something we can reach on this side of heaven.”
Chasing the secular world’s idea of perfection leaves women exhausted, she said.
“Buy the different message, the one that the Church offers,” Smyth encouraged. “If we enter in the mystery … we can start to find silence and rest, and we will come face to face with the incarnate God, a God that loved us so much that He decided to enter in the world to be with us.”
Smyth reminded the women when Isaiah wrote his prophecy of the coming of the Lord – 700 years before the angel Gabriel appeared to Mary.
“Can you imagine waiting?” Smyth asked. But then, she noted, Jesus “came into the world, and I can imagine man’s soul exhaling, because now he remembered God, and he remembered he was worthy of God’s love.”
She encouraged participants to remember the true beauty of Advent and Christmas.
“We don’t have to wait like they did, but we can’t forget the wait. The world will try to get us too distracted, too tired and too overwhelmed, but we can’t be tempted. We need to focus on who God is and who He says we are,” she said.
“The Church wants you to come in and behold the truth you already know,” she said. “You have so much worth that the God of the Universe decided it was worth His trouble to enter into the human, to be born by a woman, and get to you.”
— Lisa M. Geraci