A beggar on the street corner is not a new sight for most of us. We might look away, pity them or even say a prayer for them. Deep inside, though, aren’t we all just a little bit like beggars ourselves? Don’t we all beg throughout our everyday lives? Whether it be in prayer or just in the unceasing chaos of our own endless thoughts, each day we constantly ask God for things.
Think about what you routinely beg for: security, joy, peace, assistance, healing, promotion, gratification? These can possibly motivate us in the wrong direction. Are these wants and needs only for our own good? Are our wants terribly one-sided? In our begging, we can become blind to God’s plan and His desire for us – what He made us for.
We beg for our wants, but what does God want for us?
Do we do all we do purely for self-gratification or for love of others? Here I am reminded of Solomon, who repeated the phrase “Vanity of vanities. It is all vanity” (Ecclesiastes 1:2). What do we want the outside world to see? What do we want purely for our own comfort?
I recently experienced such a scenario when I delivered a donation to a local homeless shelter for women. Checking one thing off my long to-do list, I was so happy as I drove out of the parking lot. My thoughts were on self: “What a good Christian I am to have organized this charity and carried it out!” Yet, I never stopped to pray for the people of the shelter. I did not stop to thank God that I was able to do this act of kindness.
In his book “The Imitation of Christ,” Thomas à Kempis reminds us: “He does much who loves much. He does much who does a thing well. He does well who serves the common good rather than his own interest. Now that which seems to be charity is oftentimes really sensuality for man’s own inclination. His own will, his hope of reward, and his self-interest are motivated, seldom absent. On the contrary, he who has a true and perfect charity seeks self in nothing, but searches all things for the glory of God.”
When we align our requests to God, we ultimately live a more fulfilling life, and our eyes, the eyes of the spiritually blind, become open. We are like Paul when the scales fell away from his eyes three days after meeting Christ and being struck blind (Acts 9:18).
So this Lent, let us ask ourselves why we do what we do. Who are we seeking to please, impress or gratify? Let us transfigure our hearts and open our eyes to God’s will. Let our prayer be one of humble servitude wherever God may lead us to serve Him.
April Parker is a parishioner at St. Pius X Catholic Church in Greensboro and assistant principal at St. Pius X Catholic School.